“Cheats never beat!” 5 of the funniest video game cheats

There’s nothing like a painstakingly crafted, beautifully written game with a hard-hitting and heart-wrenching story that has you hooked on every moment; however, sometimes you just want to see how absurd things can get. That’s where cheats come in. Initially bursting onto the scene in 1986’s Gradius in the form of the “Konami Code”, video game cheats went from super-secret, strictly confidential information to becoming a staple of the industry and have provided us with endless laughs and shortcuts over the years.

This week, we’ll be counting down the crème de la crème of these hidden additions – the ones that had our sides bursting and the in-game NPCs thinking “Um… what’s going on?” Without further ado, let’s get cheating!

Contents:

1. Various head altering cheats
2. Overpowered units (Age of Empires)
3. Wishy Washy Banjo (Banjo Kazooie)
4. Exploding Lara (Lara Croft)
5. Various GTA cheats (Grand Theft Auto series)

1. Various head altering cheats

It’s undeniable: big heads are funny. In fact, basically anything involving heads and strange proportions, or appearance is a guaranteed barrel of laughs, and that’s precisely why we’ve got such a soft spot for any cheat that literally messes with the characters’ heads. 

The most famous iteration was probably GoldenEye’s DK cheat which made every character’s head humorously large, but the Timesplitters series upped the ante by offering the option of heads that were not only oversized, but which also rotated – a combination that added an extra layer of hilarity.

An underappreciated offering in the same vein came courtesy of Medal of Honor: Frontline, which allowed you to replace your enemies’ heads with various objects, ranging from trucks and barrels to giant friend eggs and even an entire submarine. We can assure you that there are few things as terrifying as coming face to face with an entire vessel floating towards you through the walls, knowing that somewhere inside is a soldier you can’t even see.

2. Overpowered units (Age of Empires)

The Age of Empires series was the RTS series that introduced the genre to the masses and brought along with it a range of cheats that allowed you to deploy modern weaponry against ancient civilisations, including a baby in a pram with a machine gun, a laser trooper, and a heavily armed sports car. 

And what better use could there be for such a destructive, anachronistic killing machine than sending a small battalion of them into battle against 100 blind lame priests? Who could resist an evil chuckle watching these feeble clerics try in vain to convert these mechanical monstrosities as they find out the hard way about motor vehicles and modern firearm technology all at once, to disastrous effect.

3. Wishy Washy Banjo

Banjo Kazooie was a classic that deserved a place in every 90s gamer’s collection, with its engaging and challenging platforming, as well as its wacky world of witches and weirdness, but if you ever felt that this wacked-out world needed to be a little more out there, luckily the developers had your back. By entering the cheat code “Wishy Washy Banjo”, you could fulfil the dream of any player of this classic Nintendo series… by playing as a washing machine. 

Yes, that’s right, this cheat turned Banjo the bear into everyone’s favorite appliance and let you continue the game as a piece of cleaning utility. The mechanics of the game didn’t change much once you switched gears and became a washing machine, besides a few minor limitations, but it definitely added a new dimension of madness to this already absurd game. All this cheat lacked was the option of sticking a load on and stringing some nice clean clothes out on the washing line… but you can always do that in real life.

4. Exploding Lara

Lara Croft is a boss, there’s no denying it, and the Tomb Raider game series was a huge success thanks to its excellent platforming, high-octane action, and intriguing exploration sections; however, for some young male players, this wasn’t enough. At a certain point, rumors began circulating that the possibility had been included in the game by the developers of seeing the game’s heroine in the buff.

Of course, every teenager playing the game was over the moon about this possibility, so when word reached them about a cheat code that let them see Lara naked, they jumped at the opportunity. However, unfortunately for all these kids, the code was an early example of programmer trolling and the actual effect of the code was simply to detonate Lara, delivering a brutal but effective lesson in expectations, and leaving the player horrified.

5. Various GTA cheats

The Grand Theft Auto series has truly perfected the art of the cheat code over the years, since GTA III which first blew players’ minds by letting them spawn the Rhino tank and go on destructive rampages beyond their imagination. 

Since then, the series has allowed players to enjoy flying cars, maximum body fat (fun for a few minutes until you realise the limitations on your sprinting abilities), low gravity, spawning almost any vehicle or weapon, super punches that kill people with one hit, and so much more. 

The possibilities in this incredible series are endless, especially with a handy cheat sheet by your side. Let the chaos begin…